Strippers & Inflation (Not just in your pants)

25 Jul 2009
Author: Joel The Great  |  Category: BlahBlah  |  Comments (2)  |  Add Comment

So while having random discussions in an automobile the other day, the topic of strip clubs, and strippers came up.  The discussion went on about how it is a waste of money, and how anyone who is in a serious relationship shouldn’t have a need to go to a strip club.  Which I agree with totally.  If you have a significant other, and they are unable to turn you on, then there is a serious issue that should probably be worked out.   It’s called communication.

I’m pretty sure if you ask your significant other to dance seductively for you, they will be a bit taken back. But if you are honest and open about it, they will probably be more understanding.  If you tell them you wanted to try something exciting with them, instead of you taking your hard earned money down to some sleazy bar and put it into the g-string of some strange women who may or may not have crabs, they will appreciate it, and be thankful you are honest and open with them.

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Fun Fact: If your significant other does decide to dance seductively for you, chances are you’ll be able to get more than just a lap dance if you know what I mean.  *wink wink* *nudge nudge*

If they think you’re a pig for trying to get them included in whatever sick needs you have, then obviously, there is bigger issues you need to work out.

But this isn’t really what I want to get at about strippers and strip clubs today… The thing I find interesting is how much of a bargain the entertainment is compared to before.  

I have never been in a strip club, so my knowledge of them comes from TV, Movies, and second hand information from people I know who have gone.

If you have no clue what a Strip Club is, or a Stripper is, well, go google it. It’ll be very educational. (Not recommended for children under 18 to google such things)

Basically you go to a really horrible bar, with a bunch of perverted guys, and throw money on a stage that women are dancing on while they remove articles of clothing.  Some states have laws in regards to how much clothes they can remove and such forth, but who cares, naked women! Right?

Sometimes you can slip the dollar bills into their underwear, and supposedly if you are willing to pay extra you can get a private lap dance or what not.  Like I said, I am not 100% certain on how this all works since I’ve never been.

Now, excluding the lap dances/private rooms and the horrible alcohol, strip clubs are very cheap forms of entertainment!

In fact, every year, the cost of going to a strip club technically goes down.  Lets do some math.

Say it’s 1980, and you go to a strip club.  You spend $50 in singles on the ladies dancing on stage.

Well say it’s 2009, and you also spend $50 in singles on the ladies dancing on stage.  You get the same amount of entertainment (And better quality since more time to learning better ways to strip has passed) for a lot less money!

What? What do you mean that’s wrong, you still spent $50!  Well, yes, you still spent the same $50, but you always forget about one thing.  INFLATION! (not just in your pants, I’m talking economy here)!

Think about it, $1 would buy you a lot more in 1980 than in 2009.  According to this inflation calculator: “$1.00 in 1980 had about the same buying power as $2.74 in 2009.”

That means, if strip clubs were to follow the prices of inflation, your $50 today would actually cost you $137!  So you are getting $137 of stripping for $50!  I know the logic seems odd, but lets look at other entertainment industries.

Movies – According to ‘The Internet,” to go see a movie in theatres ranged between $2-$5 around 1980.  Were now it is between $7.50-13.50 at the closest theatre to me.

Bowling – Well I’m tired of trying to find the answer, but now it costs around $20-$30 a game to go bowling, where back in the 1980’s I’m pretty sure it was much less.

Drinking – All you alcoholics know that the cost of booze has always gone up, same with cigarettes and such over the years.

But strip clubs, and strippers.  As far as I know they all accept dollar bills.  Yes you could go in and use $5 bills instead, or $20 bills, and the Stripper will probably pay more attention to you if you do.  But the point being you can and always will be able to use dollars!

Joel’s Pro Tip to save the Stripper industry:

This is my thought on how strip clubs can fix the issue with the value of the dollar dropping.  Pull a Chuck E. Cheese.

The Chuck E. Cheese move is to eliminate real money on the game floor.  You pay them money to get tokens to use in their machines.  Lots of arcades use this ploy.  That way all the money is in one place, controlled, and they can adjust for inflation easily.

So what the strip clubs should do is make some fake bills.  Monopoly money basically. Put their logo on it, color it whatever they want, just make it hard to counterfeit.

That way patrons will have to buy a wad of those bills, say 100 Stripper Dollars for $75 or something like that way.  That way they pay more for the same service they have been getting.  All the money would be controlled at one cashier cage area, and they can adjust prices to suit their needs.

The Strippers than can take their wad of Stripper Dollars into the back and cash it out at whatever rate was agreed upon and handle that transaction behind the scenes.

The strip club can make the money different colors, like Monopoly.  Green for tipping money, Blue for lap dance bills or something like that.

Added bonus!  When people are using stuff that is not REAL money, they tend to spend more because they don’t associate it with actual cost!  So people would probably spend more at the club!!

I should get the Nobel Peace Prize for that idea.

If you go to strip clubs or not, they seem to be the only legal entertainment industry that does not jack it’s prices up.

Pro Tip: Hitler started his career as a stripper? No..not really.

2 Responses to “Strippers & Inflation (Not just in your pants)”

  1. G R Lee Says:

    Do you have any idea how happy the strippers were when paper mney became acceptable? Lugging 20 bux in silver cartwheels in the g string or bra is no fun! Your idea of Stipper bux wont fly. Some of the dames use the “tips” as unreported income and they are not going to want the boss or the Income Removal Suction knowing exactly how much they made. The over-priced drinks are another faction. The beer you buy at the bowling alley for $4 will set you back about $10 at the Sleazy Strip Club. The bourbon, rum, scotch, etc is (a) watered and (b) despite what the bottle lable says is some cheap off brand that the Sleazy Stip is charging the Chival Regal / Hennessesy’s price.
    It would have to one hell of a significant other to put up with my dancing, erotic or otherwise. “The wonderful thing about the dancing bear is not how gracefully he dances but that he dances at all.” Free enterprise is wonderful. You can see almost the same thing for FREE at the beach. The lighting is better, the hot dogs and beer are cheaper and the females look good even in good light.

  2. Natasha Says:

    I am a stripper, without crabs btw, and this is not a new idea. Strip clubs have monopoly money already sorry to crush your dreams for a nobel peace prize.