Mirrors are not hard to use.
As I sit on the balcony of my hotel room, overlooking the warm sunny beach front below…what should I see? A beautiful suntan lotion/gap commecrial type scene? No, of course not, that’d be retarded.
I see regular, non-air brushed, every day type people. Which is totally okay with me, I hate marketing. Regular people are completely fine with me. Women, kids, men, all swimming, playing, having a wonderful time at the beach. It’s a wonderful day to be at the beach.
But amongst those regular people, there are those who apparently have never learned of things called ‘mirrors.’ A mirror is basically a peice of glass that allows you to see a reflection of whatever it is facing. So if you stand in front of it, you can see YOURSELF! (I know, it’s like magic, but don’t be scared..)
It is obvious these people have never learned about mirrors, because they dress very innapropriately for the beach. I do not want to see your cottage cheese legs. I do not want to see your c-section scar jiggle on your stomach as you walk down the beach.
I am glad you are okay with your body, that’s fine. But if you are 5 feet tall, and weigh over 300 lbs, I do not want to see you in a bikini of any kind.
There are certain things one should not, and does not want to see when you bend over.
So do us all a favor, please wear appropriate clothing. Being a little overweight is fine. Trying to wear pants 2 sizes too small to trick yourself from reality is not fine. This goes for beach attire as well.
If you have ever heard the term ‘muffin top’ before, then you will probably agree with me; a muffin top in bikini shorts that hangs over in a way to cover the waistband of the bikini shorts, is NOT attractive.
So next time you head to the beach, or anywhere in public, do this: LOOK AT WHAT YOU WANT TO WEAR IN A MIRROR!
Mirrors are everywhere, almost every single bathroom has them! I bet if you look around your house you can find at least one!!
Pro tip: If you have no mirrors in your house, you have some serious issues and should stay away from me.
I don’t expect everyone to be a supermodel. But I do expect you to use some common sense, and know that others do not want to see your flab.
I don’t have six pack abs, but I at least know this when I go out, so I keep a shirt on because I know you don’t want to see my gut.
March 19th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
As we know, Viktor vander Dekken is notorious for nit picking. Not all mirrors are silvered glass. There are stainless steel mirrors (non-breakable survivor equipment). In ages gone by, polished brass, bronze and even gold were used as mirrors.
We expect that not only “every single bathroom” but also every married bathroom has a mirror. (sorry, couldn’t resist).
Otherwise we concur with the sentiment. It is not treat to see a Fat, fifty and flabby in skin tight pants or shirts. And yes this applies to the beer gut guy who looks like he is 15 months pregnat.