Illinois 2017 – Day 6 – Welcome To The Midwest
(If you are just getting here, you may want to start with DAY 1)
Day 6
This was basically the reason for this trip…
(The start of this series can be found here: DAY 1)
Day 5
I’ll admit it, I fucked up. But that doesn’t happen until later…
Illinois 2017 – Day 4 – The Pain Of Growing Up
(The start of this series can be found here: DAY 1)
Day 4
Today was a day to be spent basically in Seattle St. Louis (The inside joke there is I kept calling it Seattle when planning the trip).
Illinois 2017 – Day 3 – We’re All Elvis
Day 3
“Elvis is Everywhere. Elvis is everything. Elvis is everybody. Elvis is still The King!” ~ Mojo Nixon
If you haven’t figured it out from the title, or that quote, today is the day we went to… Read more…
Illinois 2017 – Day 1 & Day 2 – Dirty Driving
Due to circumstances I wish not to fully explain, the idea to make a journey up to Illinois to visit family this year was hatched many months ago. I could have posted all this on Facebook, but decided to throw this on here for the entire world to see (And mock me relentlessly about later).
Being a person who likes to not be normal, instead of driving 2-3 days straight to where we were going, and to skip driving through my most hated state OKLAHOMA, I decided to swing wide right and hit up some sites more easterly from us. This is also because flying with 2 kids didn’t sound as much fun as doing a road trip where we could see more things, and we bought a new-ish mini-van last year and I wanted to road trip the thing really bad for the past like 9 months.
Note: Us, We, etc. include my lovely wife, almost 14 year old son, and 5.5 year old daughter.
CiCi’s Pizza – Ghetto Pizza, Ghetto Coupons
I live near a big city in Mexico Texas. One of the benefits is all the variety of restaurants to go and be an ‘MURICAN! by eating more than I should. This especially holds true with the variety of all you can eat buffet’s in town! Chinese, Pizza, Mongolian, Salad, General! Any kind of food you can pretty much find! Read more…
Dear Lawnmower – Go Fuck Yourself
Dear Lawnmower, Read more…
Modified Truck – What In The Fuck?!
I spend five hundred hours a day commuting, slinking around high schools, stalking people from my car. In all my driving I’ve seen all manner of things on the road. Asshole drivers, people with trashcans for exhausts, overcompensating truck owners, trucks with exhausts sticking out the truck bed, so on and so forth. But just a few days ago, I saw a truck modified in such a manner, I was unable to use proper grammar (heh, that rhymed). Read more…
McDonald’s – Their Fail is My Win
On the way to work this evening I swung through the nearby McDonald’s to get my fat $1 burger’s on. I do this from time to time. It’s no secret. And on occasion I get crappy service from these sorts of establishments. This is obviously going to be about ponies instead of that. Read more…
McDonald’s – Any Lane! Any Time!
The other day I decided my high blood pressure, and high BMI (That’s body mass index for you idiots out there) needed some love. So I hit up one of my 1,145,532.7 local McDonald’s to get some cheeseburgers. As I don’t like dealing with humans, or getting out of my car (What? Someone whose technically overweight doesn’t want to get out of his car? BIG FUCKING SHOCK THERE!!!), I hit up the drive thru. Read more…